On First Meeting

Stream of consciousness writing.

Alone, wild, tall, sex, excellent body, young, small lines around his eyes, character, irrational, drugged, strong, violence, control, protection, safety, fear, longing.

What is missing? There is something missing. Broken nose - fuck me. Noses. He has a broken nose, a strong jaw, strong hands, awesome hands. Veins.

Intelligent, funny, knowledgeable, violence again. Why violence? No fear though. Why no fear? There is always fear.

Hand is broken. In a cast. Violence. No fear, broken, fighting, always fighting. me? him? recognition, bloody bruised, fists bloody. me? him?

Submissive, worship, slave, I will be on top, we fit together well.

Secretive, multiple facets, different boxes, keeper of secrets, liar, lies with ease.

Lines around his mouth, nice lips, kisses, holds back at every moment, alone, wants more, wants to give, collar bones that needs my tongue across them, sucking on his fingers, freedom in bondage, is hiding something he is ashamed of, space between the stomach and the groin is aching for my teeth.

Nice skin, edgy, aloof, needs to be held and touched, needs to be loved, needs, manipulative, strong, insensitive, sensitive, proud, trapped, scared, irresponsible, irascible, unrepentant, secrets within his eyes.

I want him to obey me, no limits, adventure, fun

From Journal III - October 2004